"First Year Anniversary"

James 2:20-26

I am a person you can't easily convince. You need to show me an image to be able to believe. Maybe because i am an artist, my mind is composed of a lot of images and proofs...But in my condition right now, i need to believe for a thing without an image,  for a thing which is not visible to the naked eye.

Complete trust means: every time there's pain or discomfort inside my body. I should not worry. I should not think about the recurrence of cancer. Even though it is annoying, my reaction should not be negative. Yeah... my deeds should cooperate. Declaring and praying is not enough God wants me to show it and put it into action. God knows I can easily say things, and somehow I'm struggling when it comes to application.

Yesterday was actually my anniversary of first major treatment, as I reminisce those days I must say God never leave me, He's on my side when I was inside the operating room. Nightmare...that was i felt.. (when i was inside in that cold room, naked). And you don't know if you will see another sunshine...seems I'm dead...

It's been a year... and those memories will strengthen my faith to God. And I believe the Lord will help me to be consistent when it comes to my deeds.

Praise be to God!

Millicent and the wind

Borrowed this book from Ira's collection, the story is about the girl who lived on the  mountain top. Wherein she saw trees and rocks and sunshine... but no other children. Other children lived in the valley and far from their place... In short she had no FRIENDS. One day she heard soft whispered calling her name. She was thinking who was calling her because she knew trees and rocks cannot talk. And then the voice whispered again and said " I am the wind"... to make the story short, they become friends, they played tag.  They have a lot of time to play. But there came a time Millicent was not there and the wind could not find her.  Millicent and her mother went to the valley to buy their needs. Along the way, they met some children and they are yelling and teasing her because she is new to the place. Then a strange thing happened. The wind came and picked the boy who's teasing her. All the children ran away. Millicent realized that she needs a real friend and she asked the wind to bring either boy or girl who can play tag with her all day... And the wind came back and it carried a boy. They looked at each other and millicent said, " let's play."

This story really touches my heart because I believe friends are God given. Like the wind God knows our need as a human. We need  real friend that we can touch, we can hear the voice... we can see... But now a days, or maybe when you became an adult, it is not easy to trust people. Things a bit complicated when you reached the age of maturity. ( hayan kasi nung bata ka pa di ba gusto mo na agad tumanda, because we thought maturity can help us to  handle things properly... somehow it does). 

For now, I thank God for giving me real friends, who could influence my life better. I learned how to appreciate even small things from them. Its true we cannot play tag or running game like a kid... but the joy and comfort from a friend truly create happiness. 

"The rain may be falling hard outside,
But your smile makes it all alright.
I'm so glad that you're my friend.
I know our friendship will never end." 
-- Robert Alan

Quote for today

"When you're struggling with something, look at all the people around you and realize that every single person you see is struggling with something, and to them, it's just as hard as what you're going through." 
— Nicholas Sparks (Dear John)

Rule#1: Exercise!

For more than 15 years of working to a corporate world it never came to my mind that I'm totally engaging myself into sedentary lifestyle... sometimes when you're enjoying the routine time can easily ignored. 

Last night after office hour,  I had a long walk with my friend Nancy. (My next target: jog and run ). We are very lucky because there is a big space in front of our building that we could do such activities.  The place is called Ayala Triangle Gardens ( becomes a favorite place to de-stress and chill out.)... I don't like my body when its sweating, but just for the "benefits" that I could get from it, now I'm willing to look wet hehehe. And guess what, I couldn't remember when was the last time I'm wearing a pair of rubber shoes. 

" Surviving successfully is a big job; you must have the discipline to work for it. Apathy, lethargy and depression are the killer trio. Depression can be as difficult to diagnose as cancer—just as deadly, because you made bad decisions and choices. LAUGHTER AND EXERCISE are your best friends in HEALING YOUR BODY, MIND AND SPIRIT." 

---Create your destiny by Fran Di Giacomo (Beyond magazine)

Big heart

I was diagnosed with breast cancer last April 2009. Had minor and major surgery, then 6 cycles of chemotherapy (FAC). Last October 23, 2009 was my last session, Finally, I am done with those needles, never ending blood samples, laboratories... and the smell of drugs that would kill the cancer cells inside my body. Having an uncomfortable feeling after every session would be gone... hay salamat :) And I'm very thankful to God because I'm still here, alive, maybe not complete in my physical body, but I can still perform the normal duties that I have as a wife, mother, daughter, friend and employee.
 
In the meantime, God is reminding me to live one day at a time. I need to focus and live happily, not to worry on what tomorrow may bring... i can still be proud and say that cancer is not scary... and I know the end of my story would be great, because I am a child of God. No one could take the joy and satisfaction of being with God... No one...

Praise Him!!! :) Praise God with a BIG HEART!!!

Tough times

Trials come because we live in a broken world, but we decide if we will learn the lessons taught. There are no “ifs” about it—it is an important way to grow.

—Bill Crowder

Tough times can teach us to trust.

Though you cannot see the outcome,
Trust the Lord—He knows what’s best;
Be assured He sees your trial,
And He’s with you in your test. —Hess